Self Care Brings Power
May 05, 2022
Back when I was younger, I regularly pitched my mom on my latest rigorous exercise program. After all, she’s the one who gifted me Younger Next Year on my 40th birthday! I remember her taking in one of my spiels, politely considering it a bit, and responding with:
“I think the most important thing for me right now is being kind and listening to my body.”
What?! I remember thinking, kindness? Isn’t that a doorway that leads directly to binge watching movies while crunching on Doritos? To obesity and heart disease? Dementia and brain death?
Nope. Actually, she was right.
Even if we want to improve ourselves, get healthier, shed body fat, and gain muscle, coming from kindness possesses a hidden magic. When we dig deep and love ourselves, caring about our health and vitality becomes second nature.
We might want to feel lighter, and have more fun in our bodies. We might start to envision an adventurous future, with the requisite vital body and clear mind to enjoy it.
Whatever we want for ourselves, the first step is to love ourselves now. Not as a quaint passing thought, and then getting right back to beating ourselves up.
No, we need to sink into self love and kindness for real, for the long game.
You might have heard me mention this self-love reboot, backed by compelling science, in Mel Robbins’ new book, The High Five Habit.
The high five we give ourselves in the mirror first thing in the morning, before even brushing teeth and hair, says we are awesome simply being alive.
When times are hard, we can put hands on our hearts, high fiving the heart, and tell ourselves that we are okay, safe and loved.
I hear some of you asking, bottom line,
“Don’t we need to beat ourselves up, at least a little, to get the best results?”
Maybe you feel like the extra pounds around your middle, or problems with your body, represent the kindness you’ve shown yourself lately, or year after year. Now it’s time for the whip, to whip yourself into shape. Right?
Although I used to believe this reasoning without question, I know now it doesn’t work.
When we withhold love until we reach a goal, we live each day, one after another, unloved.
Even if we actually manage to reach the goal, we won’t suddenly be happy with ourselves! We still won’t be good enough. The finish line never comes.
We’ll reset to a new goal, push loving kindness aside, and continue with the awful journey.
Another option is to love ourselves first, do the work to get all of our inner parts on board for a goal, and commit to it. In this approach, we act as a force of nature, and best of all, enjoy the process!
Yes, rest assured, exercise programs deliver wonderful results when we undertake them with kindness and loving self care.
We can claim exercise as an opportunity to breathe, feel our muscles strengthen, and listen to ourselves. Exercise can transform from a form of punishment to a practice of self care.
We can make the journey, our very life and times, the best part.
Love must come first, middle, and last. Every new breath, every mirror walked past, every upset, offers an opportunity to practice.
Self love is simply a habit. Let’s practice together!
